FORGIVENESS #1

Merit on a judgmental level is the balancing of evil and good deeds.
Merit is the credit we receive on the side of good.

 

This blog logically follows the one on karma. Forgiveness goes hand in hand with karma. Forgiveness helps us to clean the karmic slate before we end our lives and go to the other side where we have to reconcile with our actions. To the extent we forgive ourselves from the sins to the higher Self, forgive others for their harmful behavior towards us and ask forgiveness for what we have done to others our karmic profile can be improved. This also pertains to our loved ones, mothers and fathers, and grandmothers and grandfathers, where forgiveness should be a priority before death. This will also help them when they ultimately face a spiritual tribunal for the errors of their ways.

 

Concerning forgiveness:
Kabbalah first teaches that you determine whether or not given the same situation you would do it again – not because of the eventual consequences that may have turned out badly but because of your assessment of the “rightness” of your actions.
Is it how you would desire being treated?
if your answer is no, then the next step is how do you make this known to all who have been hurt, scandalized and diminished by this action.
As you assess and attempt to make amends you will risk ridicule, rebuff and refusal.
It is important to accept total responsibility. Do not comfort your conscience with high-minded excuses, reasons or assurances.
Acknowledge the pain you have inflicted.
To ask forgiveness for it, is to repair in full whether or not the pain is removed or the forgiveness granted.
Understood of course, is that the offense is not continued or repeated. If it is an illicit relationship, it is discontinued; if it is stolen property, it is restored.

 

In Kabbalah repentance actually means much more, namely, returning to our Higher Self. This "Return" is properly understood as the Creator 

 saying “return to me…” 

Certainly, there is regret for harm done but to truly repent is to return to one’s place with God in gratitude and joy, not in shame and guilt – in the determination to right all wrongdoing but through the happiness of right-doing.

It is a manifestation of ultimate intent and giving; restoring to God what is God’s through our mindset, our heart-set and our actions. Apology and regret are baby steps, too often motivated by shame and fear.
Scurrying and struggling with love and joy is not just to return to our proper place but also to be of cosmic significance with acts of amendment.
These acts restore sparks of holiness and by so doing, we transform transgressions into meritorious offerings.
Kabbalah calls this “return” the highest level of repentance.
With right understanding and action we can create the conditions for transgressions to become merits.

 

“In forgiving and letting go we can then exalt in treasuring what we truly most treasure. John. O’donahue

 

There are many reasons for giving and receiving forgiveness. These contrast with some popular dogmas and misconceptions such as;

 I don’t get mad I get even, forgiveness is being weak, I will never condone, reconcile … etc. This does not mean that we forget the harm that was done. We can remember the lesson but still forgive. Forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciling the relationship.

When there is a continual rerun of old tapes and stories we get stuck in, and become our stories. This is counterproductive to spiritual transformation. Some of the biproducts of forgiveness are:

 

Compassion

“We are all in the same boat on a stormy sea and we owe each other a terrible loyalty” G.K. Chesterton

“…. What counts is to restrain the blaze in the hours of desire and let it flow into the hours of prayer and service.”  Talmud

 

Remorse. Redemption and Hope 

“A person cannot find redemption until s/he sees the flaws in his soul and tries to efface them. Whoever shuts out the realization of his flaws is shutting out redemption. We can only be redeemed to the extent to which we see ourselves.” The Talmud

 

Karma can be mitigated through forgiveness. Karma is about the choices we make and the consequences of those choices. Forgiveness can help to erase some of those consequences.

 

“It is very dangerous to go into eternity with possibilities which one has oneself prevented from becoming realities…”
Soren Kierkegaard

"To err is human to forgive divine."

 

Cleansing

“Iniquities are etched upon our bones such that traces remain even when God forgives. One must acknowledge and confess the wrongdoing to have the stain cleansed and the record removed. “ Ezekiel

 

 Healing

“When a deep injury is done to us we never fully recover until we forgive.” Alan Paton

 

Return to the Higher Self or Soul. Sacredness.

When you no longer need to be right, the perfection of your soul will shine through.

The soul yearns to do the Creator’s will and clings to the body when all is well.
A body caught up in cravings and attached to sentient pleasures distances the soul.
The soul withdraws causing illness.
The body’s unskillful attachments needs to be broken so the soul (essence) can return to the body.

 

“From the sound of my sighing has my essence (soul) cleaved onto my flesh (body.)” King David the psalmist

 

Forgiveness is critical in allowing redemption from soul sickness or loss. “Sighing” refers to the equanimity attained when the soul returns and cleaves to the body again after it has separate as a result of malevolent actions. This is similar to the parable of the prodigal son or daughter returning in wholeness to the divine Father/Mother. 

 

Return is the key … joyously turning from doubt, suspicion and indifference to trust, hope and love. Return is speaking of the soul’s essence again lodging comfortably in the body.

 

“Forgiveness is part of the treasure you need to craft your falcon wings and return to your true realm of Divine Freedom.” Hafitz

 

No one is perfect. All of us are on a journey towards spiritual perfection and some of us are further back along the countless wheels of samsara of our lifetimes than others. 

 

“To confront a person with his own shadow is to show him his own light.” Carl Jung

 

“To listen a soul into disclosure and discovery is the
greatest service one human being can offer another.”

Quaker saying

 

Contrition and redemption are always possible no matter how strong the ego, how unskillful monkey mind or how dark the shadow or the evil inclination. However, one has to be capable of seeing it and having the strong intention to do something about it because of remorse and regret. There are those few with soul loss, however, who may be incapable of redemption. The soul has divorced from the body completely - ego, shadow are now alone and influenced by all the wrong forces. The tricksters and dark forces also hold sway.

 

Without forgiveness it will be difficult to truly find the serenity we desire to go forward spiritually. Ancient wisdom has shown, and now neuroscience is proving, that forgiveness may be vitally important for the one doing the forgiving not just the one who is being forgiven. 

Forgiveness increases the immune system and our T cell counts. AIDS patients who forgave the person that transmitted the virus lived longer and had fewer complications than those who had not. Compassion also enhances immunity. Cynicism relates to the tendency to hold a grudge. Cynicism decreases our T cells and immune system. Guilt, shame and lack of self-forgiveness (self-condemnation) can increase pro-inflammatory factors leading to atherosclerosis, some auto-immune disorders and some cancers. Forgiveness of Self and others is healthful! The effects of guilt and shame include; a decrease in self-motivation and control, being less accountable rather than accountable as well as depression and “dis”-ease (sickness within) which can lead to disease.

 

We are all worthy of forgiveness and we all made in the image of the Creator with a pure soul. Ego (the small self,) Monkey (Narrow) Mind, our Shadow, Store Consciousness, a negatively primed subconscious and tricksters get in its way of our pure nature. We are a ray of Divine light and a tiny yet significant imprint of the Infinite One’s Light or “Flame.” As above so below, as without so within. Forgiveness is to return to purity, holiness and wholeness.