Judgment #3

The sages have high standards and teach that we should have;

 “Mercy to the point of recalling only the good qualities of our tormentor.

Remembering them in the innocence of their infancy.
Mercy beyond the letter of the law ...” Cordovero

This the more so with those we love or care about.

"Never judge in a condemnatory way, never with disavowing and lack of love. You must support emotionally without condoning. You must acknowledge what is wrong so as not to impair conscience. Acting contrary to conscience is different from justifying and rationalizing wrong doing. The latter compounds not merely worsens. It influences and endangers future decision.”  The Ancestors

 There is a shadow side to not judging others and especially one’s loved ones and condoning wrong actions. It may seem like we are being benevolent but it is harmful both to them and to us. One can lovingly correct them, with the mercy of our words and with what Marshall Rosenberg calls Non Violent Communication or even the more popular "talking circle and object." 

"Emotions run high - feelings run deep. Emotions require discipline. Feelings require nurturing. The better one controls emotions the more one can express feelings." The Ancestors

The principles of the "circle" are: 1. Talk about oneself and one's own feelings such, as; "I am upset, I am angry" etc. If one can put a like or a that in front of the statement it is not a feeling but can be an unskillful emotion; such as I feel like you are an idiot or that you are pathetic. No pointing of fingers (remembering there are usually three pointing back at you.) 2. Talk from the heart the truth as you know it. 3. Listen to the other from the heart. 4. Be brief and to the point. This is powerful in a group but can be effective also, one on one. Only the one who has the talking object holds the floor and everyone will have their turn.

The Ancestors recommend that we do not necessarily refrain from judging but that we do not judge harshly and judge favorably. They  advise us to"sweeten the judgments."  Discernment and discrimination may be useful words to embrace.

It is extremely difficult for most of us not to judge but the Tree of Life shows us a triad with two sephirot; one of Mercy and the other of Judgment with Love the intermediary between them. We need to discern rather than to judge and to temper our judgment with mercy for our own sakes and  for the sake of our karma.  It also helps to remember that our subconscious is diligently recording all our thoughts and words and these will return to us and will later impact our conscious actions. 

"… human beings by changing the inner attitude of their minds, can change the outer aspect of their lives.” William James

When we judge others, there may be an effect not only on the other but also; the one we are talking to, our subconscious, the community (if judgment gets spread around,) and beyond the veil between worlds as well. We all dance to the beat of a different drum and as long as someone is doing no harm,  judgment should be avoided.

“We are marionettes of awesome power in that strings connect us to countless supernal worlds but we control the strings. Our actions in the world influence the spirit worlds above. A simple act of kindness opens a spigot for more kindness to flow into all our levels of experience which empowers others who experience it.”

“Do not spread a bad image of anyone or any group - even if true
 (or to the person himself.)
Do not share information that can cause harm.
Do not embarrass even in jest.
Do not pretend that innuendo or body language are not speech.” Chofetz Chaim

“Great are the righteous for they transform judgment into compassion.” Genesis Raba 33.3

Jesus taught; “Love your neighbor as yourself.” The ancestors take this a step further by saying we should treat others as they would like to be treated. Another may differ significantly from ourselves and may not appreciate being treated as we would want to treat ourselves.     

"You shall not covet your neighbor's house. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor." Exodus

Someone - out of judgment and with a heart full of envy - may covet something or even worse want to deprive that person of what they have for reason of jealousy or even to possess it themselves. This feeling is at the heart of witchcraft and sorcery, and hence this key commandment of only10. The negative karmic consequences of the dark arts are profound.

“Malice sucks up the greater part of her own venom and poisons herself.” Montaigne

“Hatred does not cease thru hatred at any time. Hatred ceases through love. This is an unalterable law.”  Buddha

"You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge ... I am the Lord.” Leviticus

 Over and above the criminal justice system which has its own role to play in keeping us safe. Exacting even justifiable vengeance is egregious to the Creator. “Vengeance is mine saith the Lord.”

“Vengeance is Mine, and retribution. In due time their foot will slip; For the day of their calamity is near, And the impending things are hastening upon them.”  Deuteronomy

Karma is relentless and will settle all valid grievances, often sooner, rather than later. After death reconciliation with a spiritual tribunal, will determine a fitting rebirth - we don't get away with anything! Hence the fact that we undergo so many lifetimes to achieve a measure of spiritual purity.

“An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.” Ghandi

“Do not say I will repay evil. 

Wait for the Lord and He will save you.” 

Do not say, "Thus I shall do to him as he has done to me; 

For I will render to the man according to his work (his karma.)"                                   

“Rejoice not when your enemy falls, and let not your heart be glad.” Proverbs

“Do not repay anyone evil for evil…” Romans

Vengeance is antithetical to spiritual transformation ...

“… and do not give the devil a foothold. “Ephesians